In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Not for Thee.”
“What is the best piece of advice that you have been given, that you would not give to others. Why would this not work for other people.”
I suppose one of the best pieces of advice I have ever received, I actually understood overtime. I spent a lot of time with my Gran when I was growing up, she took me to school, she picked me up after school, she fed me dinner and helped me with my homework. As I got older she would still drive me around, she would lend me money in slightly difficult times ( as a student 😉 ) and really was and still as the ultimate gran.
Through all of the mini adventures and times I have spent with my Gran, I have had great times and like everyone I have been faced with disappointment, heartbreak, and all those other horrible negatively descriptive words. Overtime I felt I had failed whether it be in an exam or with the most popular girl in school, my gran would always offer me the one, solid piece of advice. One saying that can be made to suite any time that an opportunity would pass you by… “Whats for you, Wont go by you”.
As a youngster, it was just so olden day saying, it didn’t apply to me not getting the lead part in the school play, or that i never scored the winning goal at lunch time football (jackets down, fly away ball out). Or at least I never thought it did.
Then I got older, I got a part as Danny in “Grease” the yearly school play. I got older again and signed for the local football club that everyone aspired to play for, jeez I even made it to the Scottish Cup final ( the Champions league final of my level). We lost, and it was the most horrible feeling I had felt in a very long time. But one thought came to mind.. one look into the crowded stadium stand and there she was… Whats for you won’t go by passed through my mind. It wasn’t to be, and I convinced myself I would get another chance at it one day. We did ..
Once I reached adulthood I started to consider the saying as it passed through my mind.. it had never done me wrong. If something doesn’t work out, it wasn’t meant to be, and I believe there is a reason for that. You didn’t get that job, because there was another job out there better for you, your relationship ended, because you weren’t ready for it at that time in your life, and one day you will realise that. That way of thinking in negative circumstances, has never failed me, heck, I even have it tattooed on my body.
I supposed the advice itself sprouted a way of thinking positively and allowed me to deal with things in a mature way.
I don’t know if this advice would be for everyone though. One reason being, that some are lazy. The saying is not an excuse. It doesn’t mean that for example, you don’t have to go out and work and find that perfect job, because if its for you it will find you. Some people live to this idea, and so many opportunities pass them without them even realising it.
Another reason would be that people who think about this and see it as a reason to take risks. Risks with there relationships or at work, as if its for you, you will get away with it.
I suppose it comes down to fate. Do you believe in fate? I do. But it believe that we still need to work hard, try hard and give it everything we’ve got. Yes, you can argue if its fate it was always going to happen.. but through these efforts we learn so many important lessons.
Life is about these experiences and the lessons and wisdom we learn from them. Thats what my gran taught me. Im not sure this is what she set out to teach me or if she even fully believes in the saying herself. But thats the advice that sticks with me, and thats the advice thats had the biggest contribution to how I approach life.
Thanks for Reading.